Senseless speech

Laying there drunk and Naked. 

Specially weird when you are alone .

Or want to be alone. Or end up being alone.

Or desire to be alone but can't quite get it right.

The children are playing outside. I could go to my balcony naked and piss in their field if I wanted too. I could scream swear words naked. They would be forced to watch me. There wouldn't be a gain for me I suppose. 

Birds chirp. Mindless birds. They have no idea with their insect brains.

My schizo friend  called me today. She is very hot. Like the kind of hot you want to fuck. No sense in her speech. But sounded exiting. 

VIDEO ONE

Sense not

The Locusts Swarmed Upon The Lonely Old guy Screaming for Mercy,
He Was so lonely And Heart broken.
So He thought for a Second That a Life of Misery Could Still Deserve Some Retribution.
He Wasn't Conceived as that, as the Lord's words were not To be Rebutted.

And Pain an anguish showered him,
Heart borne to no Faith.
 He Accepted his Fate.
And Then he went.
With Nothing Great to Recount For His own existence.

 Into the abyss.

Dark and Endless as Human's Hate and stupidity.

A different Kind of Abyss where he could Transcend and be free.
Where the Pure Where Pure and the Wicked laid fearful upon the sword,

A Sword that Shed No Blood nor Slain a single wound.
But Punished wasted souls, That feed upon, pain.

-Sir Can you order please? you are Holding the line...

- Oh yeah A double cheese burger please....

Piss on you

Shaving takes such a long time.

I do not know about others but I shave my legs.

And crotch too.

Well all over.

I wanted to say ass but that's too vulgar. Saying butt is too nice.

There is no way to win.

Writing naked in the morning in my bathtub feels strange but charming.

Body hair bugs me a lot I don't quite know why.

It makes me feel less evolved for some reason and dirty.

A lot of stuff does. 

Toilet paper is gross to me.

I think about it as if I were a giant.

And In giant form I can see all I would be missing at wiping. 

And it messes with my head.

I heard about vedous? Vudiuas. Vuiasiaioa. I don't need to look it up. 

It's a thing that clean your ass with an stream of clean water and soap. 

It must be vedous, google translated me, I can't even write like Keurac and burrows did since the corrector takes it away.

I wonder if who invented this was thinking about his filthy anus.

Or his friends filthy anuses.

Or of his friends filthy anuses while talking to them while having ice cream. Or talking to kids.

Or while talking to your mom.

On graduation etc.

Have you thought about it? Maybe he was OCD with his own ass.

What a bitch to do, but it's worth it since I feel better with myself.

But I do a lot of weird stuff to feel more alive.

Simple things help.

Today I shaved my eyebrows almost to unexistance.

Yesterday I bought a pair of heels I can walk around.

Don't get me wrong I know this all points to the obvious answer but that's not exactly what happens.

I'm scared of boredom. 

I'm afraid of being boring.

Being afraid of being boring, you'll do whatever it takes to not be boring.

At least in your eyes.

Have you been at a house party with everybody being quiet and safe?

To be entertaining and meaningful.

I don't know if that's how other people think. 

Strange stuff seems so interesting to me,

But what if the strange becomes a norm. 

Like Mohawks, punks, gay people. Goths. How can you be special in a world that was created as a reaction to the first one. 

And then if you like something that is not in the norm of the unnorm you are an outcast of the outcasts.

Like liking Marilyn Manson or Lady Gaga. Just as an example. Most popular music is a product and they all know it. But how dare you to like this dude covering bowie burning and breaking shit and causing disgust.

 I want to be that on my terms.

You aren't a true goth. Whatever that means.

I have to admit it really does help a lot to have a place to be. If that didint exist I don't know where would my mind be. 

I can imagine this poor gay people in Russia as of January 2014. That shit is illegal for example.

By the way I chose to write that shit instead of "that situation" because the second seems Hypocrite to myself. It's a chosen thing. But "proper people" would piss in you.